How Do I Choose My Groomsmen?
How Do I Choose My Groomsmen?
Let’s face it, guys. The tough part, for you, is over. You found the girl of your dreams, spent months saving up for a ring, sweated over planning the perfect proposal, and somehow – convinced her to say, “Yes!”
Now, you just have to sit back as she plans the perfect Pinterest wedding of her dreams.
Just kidding, of course. There is still plenty for you to do in the wedding planning process – you aren’t off the hook just yet. But perhaps one of the more exciting decisions to be made, by you and only you, is the selection of your groomsmen.
If we’re being honest, this isn’t really something most guys think about before they get married. While women may have their list of bridesmaids in their heads for years before the question is asked, most men just don’t think that far ahead. And besides, that isn’t really how they quantify their friendships. You guys know who you can count on; you don’t need to think about them in terms of potential future groomsmen.
But now, here you are – and it’s time to choose the men who will stand beside you on your big day.
The good news is, the commitment for groomsmen is slightly less involved than that of a bridesmaid. Sure, they may have to travel for the wedding, but that could be true of any of your guests. And while a tux or suit is generally involved, men have options for renting that just don’t exist for women. Bridesmaids also have a slew of pre-wedding events to plan, while the groomsmen generally only have one – and planning the bachelor party is hardly a hardship for most men.
Still, these are the guys you are going to be asking to support you on the biggest day of your life. They are the ones who will produce the bottle of whiskey when you need it most and who will provide the comic relief when the stress of wedding planning starts to get to you. So they still serve a pretty important role, and selecting those men who will stand behind you is still a big decision to make.
The best place to start is with your best man. Most guys don’t need to spend a ton of time contemplating this decision. There is usually one friend who has always had your back, or a family member you have always known you could count on. Whoever he is, your best man is the guy who will be making a speech on your wedding night and keeping you out of jail at your Bachelor party – so make sure he is someone you can trust and rely on!
From there, talk to your fiancé about the number of bridesmaids she plans on having, but don’t feel pressured to meet or match her number. If there are just three guys you want standing behind you on the big day, go for it – even if that means they will each be walking down the aisle with two women on their arms. It’s not like they’re going to complain about that!
There also isn’t as much ceremony to asking one of your buddies to be a groomsman as there is with brides and their bridesmaids. Sure, the guys you pick are going to be honored, but there’s no need to get too formal about this. Invite them all out for a beer and let them know that after years of friendship, you are hoping they will stand with you on the biggest day of your life. Then, start planning the details of your Bachelor party together!
Remember, this is the fun part – and your groomsmen are the men who are going to make it that much more exciting!