Listen, ladies. It’s time we have a heart to heart.
You have that gorgeous rock on your finger, an even more gorgeous man on your arm, and you’ve hired me to take the pictures of you on your big day that you hope to frame, display, and cherish from now until the end of time.
(You are going to print and frame those pictures, right?)
So as your trusted wedding photographer, I’m going to need you to do me one big favor.
Put the beer bottle down.
Now, before you get your panties all in a twist, let’s talk about why. It’s not because of the carb content (you look beautiful just as you are, and I can’t wait to photograph you in your dress!) And it has nothing to do with me lobbying for sobriety for all (I like a good beer as much as the next girl!) No, this is about those pictures, and about how ridiculously tacky that beer bottle is going to look against your wedding dress.
For the record, I’m no snob. If you’re out with friends for the weekend, or enjoying a campfire huddled next to your love, you hold that beer bottle proudly! Take the pictures, cheers each other, and don’t give it a second thought!
But on your wedding day? Trust me when I tell you that the day will come you’ll loathe that bottle taking the attention away from you, your smile, and your dress. It just doesn’t fit in the picture. It looks tacky and it distracts from the beauty you’re otherwise radiating.
For whatever it’s worth, this isn’t a sexist thing; I’m not a fan of beer bottles in the pictures your groom takes with all his groomsmen either. But for whatever reason, there is just something about the bride holding a bottle of beer as she smiles adoringly at her new husband that really takes some of the magic away from the image.
Not only that, but I want you to imagine the background of your photos for a second. Empty plates and half-finished drinks are going to be inevitable in those shots, but imagine a bunch of empty beer bottles stacked around the tables behind you as well.
Not a pretty picture, right?
So here’s what I propose: Talk to your bartenders about chilled glasses and pouring every beer they hand out. Give specific instructions that no bottle should leave their sight. It’s not that hard, really, and most bartenders will understand when you explain. Plus, who doesn’t prefer a chilled glass over a bottle anyway? At the bare minimum, all women wearing a super fancy white dress shall have every beer served to them in a glass.
Okay, so plenty of people like their bottles (I’m willing to bet you have an uncle or two who has really strong feelings about this), but… this is your wedding day. And it’s an open bar. So they can just shut their mouths and class it up for a single night.
Now, at the after party? You feel free to enjoy as many bottlenecks as your little heart desires. This is your day, after all, and you deserve it. But as long as I’m on the clock, just keep those pictures in mind. No one will ever think to question the placement of a beer or wine glass in the pictures I take for you, but 10 years down the line… you might just regret clinging to that bottle I tried to convince you to put down.
Trust me, I wouldn’t say anything if I didn’t care.